just for today

Some words of wisdom, from AlAnon:

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."

Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do - just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.

Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

I'm looking forward to this weekend. I think I can fit alot of meetings in! Maybe I can get some sleep too. I'm so tired!

For the most part I'm just grateful to be sober, and to have experienced peace today.

I sense that a coworker of mine hates me. She mistrained me a few times over the past week, the most recent time being blatantly intentional. She won't look at me or talk to me -- even when I say, "Good morning". At first, I was tempted to get upset and offended. But now, all I can see is the pain and fear inside of her. I can't feel angry or hurt when I see that someone is suffering. I need to grow and become helpful.

At the same time, I am responsible for my own serenity. I cannot allow the actions of other people to affect my serenity, whether for better or for worse. My serenity must be based on something immovable and timeless -- something that never changes. From that point, life can crash or fly ... but serenity would always remain balanced.

And now I'm just typing because I'm exhausted and can't think of anything else to say. It's time for bed ...


Today, I'm especially grateful for ...

• being 197 days sober (in dedication to an AA buddy, those would be "197 DAMN days" sober!)
  
• Alcoholics Anonymous and AlAnon
• going to my favorite AA meeting tonight: "If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it." This group makes people want it!
• the wisdom and generosity of other recovering alcoholics
  
• prayer
  
• finding a way to accept a few initially unwanted circumstances and find gratitude in them
• my loving and supportive family
• my adorable dog
• my coworkers ... even the troubled ones
• God, because He makes serenity and peace possible