Sober since April 6, 2006


Tuesday, March 27, 2007

all in time

There's a saying I really cling to: "Be profound, be funny, or be quiet." I can't be profound or funny right now, so I should be quiet ... but I feel the need to slap something up here.

I'm doing okay. I'm staying sober one day at a time and trying to avoid mourning over the past or worrying about the future.

Someone asked the other day about a future goal of mine. That set off an avalanche of thought.

I did some research and found that I can't achieve that goal with the small income from my current job. I'll need a higher-paying job. But my employment history is in such bad shape, I'm extremely lucky just to have my current job ... nobody else would want me right now.

So maybe I'm right where I should be. For now. That future goal will just have to wait. It isn't time yet.

It's tempting to sit here and fume about how stupid I was years ago, and how I "should have" done this or that, and "if only" I hadn't been so stupid, I would have more opportunities today ... so now I'm a loser and an idiot and all I can do is suck it up and bear the consequences of my past actions. Waaa. Pardon me while I cry a river.

But wallowing in misery wouldn't change anything. In the mean time, I can be grateful for what I have today and concentrate on what God wants me to do today.

I know people who have just lost loved ones, others who are watching loved ones destroy themselves, others who are struggling to make ends meet, and others who seem to have no problems at all. In the grand scheme of things, I have no problems at all ...

When I stop focusing on what I don't have, I see the miracles of the blessings in my life today. There are so many.


Trudging said...

As it says on page 417 and 419 of the Big Book, we all have that Magnifying Mind. Remember the promises

An Irish Friend of Bill said...

EVERYTHING happens for a reason.
Never mind the past. The way to have a GREAT tomorrow, is to GET TODAY RIGHT.
Focus on that. I never run out of work to do if i just TRY to do that! Today is PLENTY!

You'll see! It'll ALL make sense down the line..
You're doing really well.

Khakra said...

...and there's just couple days left to celebrate those miracles and blessings even more! i can't wait to say congratulations!

lushgurl said...

Hi TK, I have been meaning to stop by for a while... I am glad to meet another woman in recovery! I like how you've reminded (me) to focus on the blessings instead of what we don't have. We have another day sober, and that is a blessing of its' own!
Less than a week before you celebrate a year huh, that is so cool! Keep up the great work

Anonypus said...

Blech! I catch myself wallowing for the past. The dominating one has to do with my age and the 10 yrs lost....whaaaaa.

On another note, I had to password my blog...I would love for you to keep visiting so if you send me your email to'll be sure to add you!