Consequences

A video on CNN's website details how a recovering alcoholic, through following the steps of AA, has once again shattered the life of a woman he raped over 20 years ago. His attempt to make amends only made things worse for her, and has subjected him to legal discipline from which he had escaped for many years. To see the video, [click here] (12 minutes long).

The first thing that came through my mind was gratitude. I'm so grateful that I have not been subjected to the hells of either person. I just think my life is bad sometimes. There are so many others who are experiencing indescribable trauma. Compared to them, I have NO problems.

Second, the part of the steps about making amends specifies to make "direct amends wherever possible, except for when to do so would injure others". That seems like such a fine line to me. I wonder how you're supposed to know if your amends would make things worse?

I haven't yet reached that point in the twelve steps. But I hope that I don't make things worse when I reach that point.


Today, I'm especially grateful for ...

• being 62 days sober
• being able to have lunch and go shopping with mom today
• being able to relax
• hearing from my old high-school buddy, who's getting married soon. I'm going to be a bride's maid :) I'm so glad to be sober for that!
• my loving family, who supports and loves me
• my adorable puppy, who shows me how to play
• my sweet boyfriend, who makes me feel loved
• God, who blesses me every minute of the day