Sober since April 6, 2006


Sunday, February 12, 2006

Sober for FIVE WHOLE WEEKS!!!!

Now I’ve been sober for five weeks. It may not sound like much of an accomplishment, but it’s more difficult than it seems. The urge to run away from problems is still there. The temptation to drink still comes and goes but is overshadowed with the knowledge that my own life isn’t about me. Escaping, drinking, hiding, hurting, and destructing are synonymous and reflect an almost unbreakable cycle of devastation that inflicts everyone near me with unwarranted grief.

The future is uncertain. I’m either feeling overwhelmed, frightened, and powerless about what I interpret as “change” -- or I’m feeling excited, hopeful, and energetic concerning the same issue interpreted as “opportunity”. It’s the same future -- but two different perceptions. I either see “impending doom” or “blossoming success”.

It’s interesting how changing our own outlook changes our perceived direction in life. Learning to stay positive is a difficult but necessary lesson. Excess cynicism prevents growth, but overconfidence triggers disappointment. Finding the “happy medium” is difficult.


Ms. Llerros said...

Congratulations!!! I will have 90 days on 02-28-06. The fog is finally lifting and the moments of clarity and serenity are more amazing than I could have ever imagined! Keep it up and keep in touch if you ever feel like bouncing something off another person!


(no name) said...

Hello There, Our Sweet Little Angel..... Your Dad and I are so very proud of you! You are incredibly brave and strong. We know you can do this, overcome this challenge. You have always been amazing when you are faced with a goal. Your "obstacles" seem to melt in defeat when you are determined to overcome and succeed. God has a divine purpose for your life, Sweetie. You are very, very important to Him! We know that you are going to win this battle. That you are going to go forth and do His will, receive what He has planned for you. Always, Allie..... You are a blessing to everyone who meets you and especially for those who have the great priviledge of knowing you. Always, you lift up others in love and a precious spirit of generosity. Your whole life has been about loving, caring, serving others first. Even in the midst of your illness, you continue to bless all around you. God is with you. You are divinely anointed with His purpose, with His calling. He is working with you now, lifting you up and above the tempest. Here is a poem I found, "Bear not a single care thyself.... One is too much for thee.... The work is Mine and Mine alone.... Thy work is to rest in Me." You are on the right path, our sweet little angel. Have no fear, no doubts, as He leads you into His perfect will. We love you, Mom and Dad

itsme said...

Hello i ran across your space.Congrats on your 5 weeks.Keep up the good work.Life sometimes get tough been there through soberiety and made it one day at a time.Nothings impossible now as long your willing.Life is alot better now being sober no more regrets from the night before.Just keep life as simple as can be and take it one day at a time.Good luck.....